My son’s inclination towards cello was no surprise for me. Music
runs in our blood. It was always a delight to watch his arms moving along to
the rhythm of the bowed stringed instrument. Being a proud parent of a
naturally gifted 8 year old cellist, we were already dreaming of sending him to
the Julliard School of music, dance and drama. Without any second thought, we
enrolled Adam (my son) in a Cello class where he could hone his passion for
music and become a better cellist. After four sessions, his teacher called and
told us not to send Adam for class anymore. That was a big setback. Then
followed Adam’s irritability, disobedience and other impulsive behaviors. We
realized that we needed a diagnosis to controvert the fact that Adam might be
suffering from Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD). Shortly
thereafter Adam was diagnosed with ADHD.
We were on our way with our search for special education schools in NYC. We had no idea that this search was the start of a whole new journey
for us and for Adam. To our relief, we ended up at a great school and our sole
focus now was to help Adam with emotional and behavioral regulation, focus and
impulse control. Adam had a lot of catching up to do. Forget about playing
cello, he was falling behind in reading, math and pretty much all of his elementary
learning.
Together with educators and special therapists at the special
education school in NYC, we chalked out a pathway for ourselves and for Adam.
We are still learning so much from this experience and I wanted to share a few
notes and tips in the hopes that they can help other families going through
similar situations with their children:
- Just like we mange other body ailments like headaches and high blood pressure, Adam can manage his ADHD. Obviously he can’t do it on his own, we were there to help him learn how to deal with the symptoms and situations his condition has placed on him.
- Get health insurance. You are always ready to help your child no matter what it costs, but it is better to get some financial coverage early on in the process. The Affordable Care Act provides cover for some treatments and assessments.
- Waiting for a house event or a scheduled parent-teacher meeting should never be an option. Regular parent-teacher interactions at the special education school were a positive step that ensured that we (the parents) were a part of Adam's support system.
- We enrolled Adam into individual education Program that help him with his reading and other academic assignments.
- We continue to nurture Adam’s love for music. We want to make sure that he doesn't neglect or overlook his passion for cello.
- We combined social skills development activities along with anger and behavioral management sessions.
- Most important of all- get a hold on your patience. Yelling will not help you connect with your child. We wanted to assure Adam that no matter what, we are there, listening him, ALWAYS!
We always had the confidence that Adam can swim against the tide.
The most important thing that we learned from ADHD is that understanding,
respect and patience for your child is very important. I always dreamt of Adam
playing Beethoven’s Cello Sonata #3. I know Adam would have to work really hard
to focus on his technique of bow strokes and other aspects of cello and that
his beginnings are going to be slow, but I am confident that he will do great
in the coming future. Slowly, he will improve his grades too and with the
support of his family, friends and educators, no hardships will ever limit Adam
form realizing his full potential.
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